Saturday, August 28, 2010

Thoughts...

Last night was a great night. It was Jamie's birthday. I let loose one last time before my big, getting ready for my operation in September thing. I really needed to hang out with those people again. I missed 'em.

My chinese Medicine diet and healthy diet has been working wonders on my skin. It's cleared up 90%. I only break out in extreme circumstances now. I have 3 forms of dermatitis. Imagine what this would do for someone with just Atopic Dermatitis or Seborrhoeic dermatitis. Regardless, I'm glad I stopped giving up and just attacked my condition in full force.

I might start dating again... but I might not. Things are much less complicated when you can save up money. The one thing that irks me about being single is being lonely. When Pat fell out of my life in 1997, everything was a mess. When I feel lonely, I almost relapse into that. Unfortunately, I think most girls I like and are attracted to, I just have zero luck with for various reasons I can't fix. It's like a homeless man looking into the window of a house and seeing a family socializing over a Christmas dinner in dead of winter. Yep, It's like Dickens novel...

Martial Arts has lately been the foremost on my mind lately. I was advised to quit by the eye specialist at the Retina clinic because of complications due to the surgery or some dribble like that. It's hard to quit. I keep saying I want to but truthfully, Martial Arts is one of the only things I'm passionate about. If you take away that, I only have Writing, love and family. :/

Well, those are my thoughts.

Kensei

Friday, August 20, 2010

Since last time...

Since last time, I've been working on several things. Surviving the terrible heat here in San Diego, putting together "Darkest Night," and I started a new regime of treatment for my health.

The heat here in SD has been terrible. It's been taking a toll on my health bigtime. Everyone close to me knows, I'm not good in the heat at all. My Skin inflammates and I end up looking like a giant tomato with legs. No joke. I blame it on a prior unhealthy lifestyle I chose during high school that promoted my skin condition to worsen... But anyway, this year things seem to leveling off. I might just pull through with less scarring. We'll see.

"Darkest Night," has to be completely redone. I was rereading through my manuscript or what I have done of it and I was dissappointed. I could write much better. I'm going to go with a new concept I came up with a week or so ago. I'm also going to pump my main character to be less flat and more dynamic. He was so so. More flat then dynamic. The scenery and fight scenes need to be fleshed out more too. More zest as a teacher of mine once said.

I started a Chinese Medicine and Vitamin regime last on tuesday and I have to say it's doing some noticable changes in me. I have more energy, my skin inflammation is going down and I'm feeling healthier. The sun still hurts though. I have to stay out of it as usual.

Martial Arts... I was actually advised by the first doctor I saw in Feb. to stop any full contact style if I'm thinking about it. I've been thinking It might be a good idea to stop for awhile and take a break from all that. I'm gonna continue my working out but I'm going to stop with my Martial Arts practicing for awhile. So Kensei is going into retirement again.

My life in particular right now, eh? It's in flux. I've been meditating day in and day out on my spare time to understand a particular kunumdrum that has washed up on the shores of my heart. I would normally talk to someone about it, but there is no one I feel would or could help me feel better about the situation... A mix of disappointment, hurt, sadness and pain. And I gotta figure out how to eject it for my soul.

Thats it for tonight, Tune in next time.

Kensei